Pundit & Pundette: Parenting wars: The case for unconditional love

Pundit & Pundette: Parenting wars: The case for unconditional love


And the debate sparked by Dr. Chua continues.

There are good thoughts here.

Here's hoping the debate continues. It is long long long overdue.

Steve Cohen On CNN: John King Gives Him The Opportunity To Backtrack...

...to no avail.

Cohen just kept on insisting that he was justified in his poisonous rhetoric, rejecting King's gentle suggestions that reasonable people may conclude he was comparing his House GOP colleagues to Goebbels.

King even cited words Cohen had recently published about civility in public discourse, which his words on the floor of the House totally discredited. It only made Cohen more adamant. The interview ends with Cohen comparing himself to film maker Mel Brooks, and King finally loses patience by pointing out that Brooks is a comedian, and that Cohen is supposed to be engaged in serious political debate.

One would think...but then again, this is Steve Cohen, and Tennessee Democrats, and House Democrats, led by Nancy Pelosi. OS has yet to see any Democrat distance himself from these horrible remarks by Cohen, or his aggresive re-assertion of the same.

Is there anyone, anywhere amongst the Dems willing to say: 'Yes, he's in my party, and no, he does not speak for me. There's no excuse for this behaviour on the House floor.' How about his Democrat colleagues in the Tennessee delegation, like Jim Cooper of Nashville?

(Sound of crickets chirping...)

Is there perhaps a rabbi anywhere who might wish to point out that just being a member of the Almighty's Chosen doesn't confer a special right to engage in this behaviour?

Is there an historian, or ethics professor in any Tennessee university (or any university), willing to speak up about this sort of thing?

Cohen is a Member of Congress. As citizens of Tennessee, we have a right to expect a grownup to show up on the House floor. Even Mel Brooks would be preferable, because he at least can tell the difference between Nazis and people who happen to disagree with his point of view.

Another State Dinner, Long Ago And Far Away

This being the 400th anniversary of the publication of the King James Bible, OldSouth will honor the occasion, from time to time, by sharing cogent passages. The majesty of the language does much to convey the depth of the comic tragedy of this particular tale.

Book of Daniel, Chapter 5 (King James Version)

Belshazzar the king made a great feast to a thousand of his lords, and drank wine before the thousand. Belshazzar, whiles he tasted the wine, commanded to bring the golden and silver vessels which his father Nebuchadnezzar had taken out of the temple which was in Jerusalem; that the king, and his princes, his wives, and his concubines, might drink therein. Then they brought the golden vessels that were taken out of the temple of the house of God which was at Jerusalem; and the king, and his princes, his wives, and his concubines, drank in them. They drank wine, and praised the gods of gold, and of silver, of brass, of iron, of wood, and of stone.

In the same hour came forth fingers of a man's hand, and wrote over against the candlestick upon the plaister of the wall of the king's palace: and the king saw the part of the hand that wrote. Then the king's countenance was changed, and his thoughts troubled him, so that the joints of his loins were loosed, and his knees smote one against another. The king cried aloud to bring in the astrologers, the Chaldeans, and the soothsayers. And the king spake, and said to the wise men of Babylon, Whosoever shall read this writing, and shew me the interpretation thereof, shall be clothed with scarlet, and have a chain of gold about his neck, and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom. Then came in all the king's wise men: but they could not read the writing, nor make known to the king the interpretation thereof. Then was king Belshazzar greatly troubled, and his countenance was changed in him, and his lords were astonied.

Now the queen, by reason of the words of the king and his lords, came into the banquet house: and the queen spake and said, O king, live for ever: let not thy thoughts trouble thee, nor let thy countenance be changed: There is a man in thy kingdom, in whom is the spirit of the holy gods; and in the days of thy father light and understanding and wisdom, like the wisdom of the gods, was found in him; whom the king Nebuchadnezzar thy father, the king, I say, thy father, made master of the magicians, astrologers, Chaldeans, and soothsayers; Forasmuch as an excellent spirit, and knowledge, and understanding, interpreting of dreams, and shewing of hard sentences, and dissolving of doubts, were found in the same Daniel, whom the king named Belteshazzar: now let Daniel be called, and he will shew the interpretation.

Then was Daniel brought in before the king. And the king spake and said unto Daniel, Art thou that Daniel, which art of the children of the captivity of Judah, whom the king my father brought out of Jewry? I have even heard of thee, that the spirit of the gods is in thee, and that light and understanding and excellent wisdom is found in thee. And now the wise men, the astrologers, have been brought in before me, that they should read this writing, and make known unto me the interpretation thereof: but they could not shew the interpretation of the thing: And I have heard of thee, that thou canst make interpretations, and dissolve doubts: now if thou canst read the writing, and make known to me the interpretation thereof, thou shalt be clothed with scarlet, and have a chain of gold about thy neck, and shalt be the third ruler in the kingdom.

Then Daniel answered and said before the king, Let thy gifts be to thyself, and give thy rewards to another; yet I will read the writing unto the king, and make known to him the interpretation.

O thou king, the most high God gave Nebuchadnezzar thy father a kingdom, and majesty, and glory, and honour: And for the majesty that he gave him, all people, nations, and languages, trembled and feared before him: whom he would he slew; and whom he would he kept alive; and whom he would he set up; and whom he would he put down. But when his heart was lifted up, and his mind hardened in pride, he was deposed from his kingly throne, and they took his glory from him:

And he was driven from the sons of men; and his heart was made like the beasts, and his dwelling was with the wild asses: they fed him with grass like oxen, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven; till he knew that the most high God ruled in the kingdom of men, and that he appointeth over it whomsoever he will. And thou his son, O Belshazzar, hast not humbled thine heart, though thou knewest all this; But hast lifted up thyself against the Lord of heaven; and they have brought the vessels of his house before thee, and thou, and thy lords, thy wives, and thy concubines, have drunk wine in them; and thou hast praised the gods of silver, and gold, of brass, iron, wood, and stone, which see not, nor hear, nor know: and the God in whose hand thy breath is, and whose are all thy ways, hast thou not glorified:

Then was the part of the hand sent from him; and this writing was written.

And this is the writing that was written, MENE, MENE, TEKEL, UPHARSIN.

This is the interpretation of the thing: MENE; God hath numbered thy kingdom, and finished it. TEKEL; Thou art weighed in the balances, and art found wanting. PERES; Thy kingdom is divided, and given to the Medes and Persians.

Then commanded Belshazzar, and they clothed Daniel with scarlet, and put a chain of gold about his neck, and made a proclamation concerning him, that he should be the third ruler in the kingdom.

In that night was Belshazzar the king of the Chaldeans slain.

And Darius the Median took the kingdom, being about threescore and two years old.

Tonight's State Dinner At The White House: The Missed Photo Opportunity Of The Century

Think of it!

Streisand showed up! Lots of Hollywood glitterati! Lang-Lang! Chris Botti!

And, damn, girl! Check out Michelle's dress! Whooo-weee!!! It's good being Queen! Did she buy it on her vacation in Spain? Did Oprah help her pick it out? She livin' large, gir'frieund!

All that champagne, lobster, beef, pastries, celebrity, entertainment, good feelings; and The Leader Free World, 2009 Nobel Peace Prize Laureate Barack Obama, hosting Chinese President Hu, with his special guest, the 2010 Nobel Peace prize Laureate, Liu Xiaobo. The dinner could even be in honor of yet another Peace Prize Laureate, Martin Luther King. It's his week, after all! What a public relations coup!

Think of it, two living laureates and the children of a third. What a great occasion, historic, unforgettable.

On the menu: d'anjou pear salad with farmstead goat cheese, poached Maine lobster, orange glazed carrots and black trumpet mushrooms, dry aged rib eye with buttermilk crisp onions, double-stuffed potatoes and creamed spinach. Dessert will be old-fashioned apple pie with vanilla ice cream.

Sweet!

There's a slight problem, though. Liu Xiaobo languishes in a Chinese prison.

He sends greetings, though.

Here are his opening words:

In the course of my life, for more than half a century, June 1989 was the major turning point. Up to that point, I was a member of the first class to enter university when college entrance examinations were reinstated following the Cultural Revolution (Class of ‘'77). From BA to MA and on to PhD, my academic career was all smooth sailing. Upon receiving my degrees, I stayed on to teach at Beijing NormalUniversity. As a teacher, I was well received by the students.

At the same time, I was a public intellectual, writing articles and books that created quite a stir during the 1980s, frequently receiving invitations to give talks around the country, and going abroad as a visiting scholar upon invitation from Europe and America. What I demanded of myself was this: whether as a person or as a writer, I would lead a life of honesty, responsibility, and dignity. After that, because I had returned from the U.S. to take part in the 1989 Movement, I was thrown into prison for "the crime of counter‑revolutionary propaganda and incitement."

I also lost my beloved lectern and could no longer publish essays or give talks in China.

Merely for publishing different political views and taking part in a peaceful democracy movement, a teacher lost his lectern, a writer lost his right to publish, and a public intellectual lost the opportunity to give talks publicly. This is a tragedy, both for me personally and for a China that has already seen thirty years of Reform and Opening Up.

Bon appetit, ya'll!

(Wonder what was on Liu Xiaobo's plate for dinner? Was it served by a waiter in livery? Wonder what china pattern the prison uses? Did they starch the napkins?...)


All in all, very reminiscent of another State Dinner, held long ago and far away...

Steve Cohen, D-Memphis, Equating GOP Stance On Health-Care Law To Joseph Goebbels

Really, you just can't make this stuff up. From ABC News, today.

ABC News Jonathan Karl reports:

The newfound civility didn’t last long. Political rhetoric in Congress doesn’t get much nastier than the words of one House Democrat during the debate on repealing the health care law.

In an extraordinary outburst on the House floor, Rep. Steve Cohen (D-TN) invoked the Holocaust to attack Republicans on health care and compared rhetoric on the issue to the work of infamous Nazi propagandist Joseph Goebbels.

“They say it's a government takeover of health care, a big lie just like Goebbels," Cohen said. "You say it enough, you repeat the lie, you repeat the lie, and eventually, people believe it. Like blood libel. That's the same kind of thing. And Congressman Cohen didn’t stop there.

The Germans said enough about the Jews and people believed it--believed it and you have the Holocaust. We heard on this floor, government takeover of health care. Politifact said the biggest lie of 2010 was a government takeover of health care because there is no government takeover," Cohen said.

Cohen made his comments late last night, but they have attracted no attention because his speech was made to a virtually empty House chamber with no reporters around to watch.

Well, someone was present to pass it along. OS believes it would be a good thing for this little gem to circulate and circulate and circulate, especially through the ranks of the Tennessee legislature charged with apportioning districts based upon the 2010 census. For the first time since post-Civil War Reconstruction, Tennessee has a Republican governor, a Republican House, and a Republican Senate, and large majorities in both houses. Time to begin cleaning up over 140 years of mess left behind by the Democrats.

The Congressional Districts of Tennessee are obvious Democrat gerrymanders, which finally failed to produce the expected results in 2010, because the voters outside of Memphis and Nashville had finally had enough, and the old-boy Dems got out of Dodge before they had to face the voters.

Memphis is a classic 'rotten borough', essentially ceded to the Democrats since the days of the Crump machine. It is a dependency of the Welfare State. The crime is awful. The corruption is rampant, and has long been blatant. OS has visited there on days when the racial tension was so thick that no blacks and whites would even look one another in the eye at the grocery checkout line.

Steve Cohen is a proud product of that machine.

When Memphis sneezes, West Tennessee gets a cold. OS thinks it's time that Greater Memphis (including good portions of Germantown and Cordoba, to where the middle class fled to avoid the crime and decay) should be included in the Congressional district that the Hon. Mr. Cohen would find himself attempting to win in 2012. Things would get interestinger and interestinger for him in a non-fixed election.

This speech is, well, shameful. Has one Democrat at either state or Federal level stepped up to disavow those remarks, and scold Cohen in public? Miz Nancy, you there? Paul Krugman? Former Governor Bredesen? Former Speaker Naifeh? Former State Senator Roy Herron? Anybody?

Don't hold yer breath waiting fer it, ya'll. Cohen is the face of the Tennessee Democrat Party, in full flower. Listen and judge.

Katherine Birbalsingh Weighs In On Amy Chua's 'Tiger Mother'

OS knew she would join in, sooner or later.

She has much to say that most white, comfortable, middle-class soccer-mom-football-dad parents don't wish to hear. The only path to true success in life (not just an SUV and a MacMansion) is hard work, and those habits are learned at home, taught by parents.

Like Amy Chua, my father never patted me on the back when I would get 95 per cent on a test. He would always ask, “What happened to the other 5 per cent?” As a child, it is true, I was constantly frustrated: what on earth did I have to do to please this man? But what that constant frustration inspired in me was to always try my best, to always reach for the very top. And as Amy Chua constantly emphasises, just because a parent is a bit demanding, doesn’t mean there isn’t any love. My parents were not as demanding as Amy Chua, and as such, my sister and I were allowed to watch television. When “Different Strokes” came on, (with Arnold and Willis as black boys adopted by a rich white man) my sister and I would call for my father with delight, and he would always come and watch it with us. That is, until he decided that we were watching too much television, and as if he and Amy Chua had connived together, gave our only television away.

Such parenting techniques are relatively rare in white liberal circles. And these days, with our multicultural communities, they are becoming more and more rare in non-white circles as well.  But while ‘tough love” may be the answer to giving our black boys a chance at life, so often the liberal helping hand undermines the parents who are trying to give these boys exactly this.

My Guyanese father may seem excessive to some but he sent his daughters to very ordinary state schools and had to make up for their shortcomings. And Amy Chua may be a little extreme in her parenting style, so much so that she has caused huge controversy. But if I had any advice to give to the thousands of struggling parents I have known over the years, the first thing I’d tell them is to take a page out of Amy Chua’s book and think twice about the liberal madness that surrounds us.


Lissen' up ya'll!! Ms. Birbalsingh's daddy emigrated from Guyana--look it up on the map--and sent his little girl to OXFORD! No, no, no. Not Oxford, Mississippi, that land of SEC basketball, bubbahs and drunken co-eds. The real Oxford--the one in England! THAT Oxford!

The one that's damn near impossible to get into, unless you have a real intellect and a work ethic like Monica Marks, the girl from Eastern Kentucky whose daddy insisted his baby girl was gonna succeed, come hell or high water.

That Oxford.

Thanks, Ms. B, for chiming in. Don't you let up a bit--keep after those 'liberals' who use an ideology to simply mask their laziness.

Here's hoping the conversation continues. The question is central to the survival of our culture.

OS has so much more to say, but he has work to do. University bills to pay, with the biggest grin imaginable on his grizzled Southern face...someday, he'll even get to tell you why.

The Tiger Mother Conversation Continues With And About Amy Chua

It's getting interesting out there.

New York Times weighs in.

In the week since The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt of the new book by Amy Chua, a Yale law professor, under the headline “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior,” Ms. Chua has received death threats, she says, and “hundreds, hundreds” of e-mails. The excerpt generated more than 5,000 comments on the newspaper’s Web site, and countless blog entries referring in shorthand to “that Tiger Mother.” Some argued that the parents of all those Asians among Harvard’s chosen few must be doing something right; many called Ms. Chua a “monster” or “nuts” — and a very savvy provocateur.

From academe, Mama PhD wrings her hands a bit, because as a therapist, she gets to deal with the damaged adult children of over-the-top parents. And, she has points to make as well.

At least, and at last, Dr. Chua's book is getting a real debate going about an issue no one wants to talk about--the hard grind that successful parenting truly is, whether one is a Tiger Mom or not.

In fairness, (and since OS's copy has not yet arrived), it is good to note the extended subtitle of the book.

This is a story about a mother, two daughters, and two dogs.

This was supposed to be a story of how Chinese parents are better at raising kids than Western ones.

But instead, it's about a bitter clash of cultures, a fleeting taste of glory, and how I was humbled by a thirteen-year-old.

OS is so happy to see the discussion taking place. Keep it up, ever'body!

10,000 GMAC Foreclosures Stopped Dead In Their Tracks--By A Group Of Law Students

HT Denninger.

If the fraud is so obvious that law students can convince a court of it, then all those sharks attempting to foreclose homes with robo-signature docs, and no proof of who owes what to whom are in some deep doo-doo. As is GMAC, which is a Ward of the State.

This makes for entertaining reading, and will make for interesting times once the implications play out. That's two states in one week, both of them Deep Blue, with the courts just saying no to perjured documents.

Remember when GMAC was melting down? It was an auto-finance company that decided it was a mortgage lender. Then when it needed money to stay alive, presto-chango, the Treasury and Da Fed decided it was a friggin' bank! Even has a front--Ally Bank--that runs goofy ads, pretending to be a bank. It's still GMAC, and it's still an insolvent scam. That we will end up eating the losses on.

One person (who appears to speak from the political Left) left a comment on the article is worth quoting, and he cuts straight to the ethical heart of the matter:

Instead of helping the distressed homeowners whose lives are being ruthlessly and systematically ripped apart by the criminal banks, the President had the unmitigated gall to accelerate and facilitate the unlawful forfeitures by the banks with his incredibly bogus HAMP program and then topped that disgraceful act by blaming the victimized homeowners for causing the crisis.

What kind of a man is Obama who would dare to use a nine-year-old dead girl as a stage prop to make a point about the need for civility in our dealings with others during a national speech, when he is assisting the criminal banks to steal millions of homes in the United States...?

What kind of a society are we when the only people fighting for justice are law professors and their students working for free?

At least, sir, we have them. And, there is a glimmer of hope out there, if these folks are willing to take on a GMAC.

Next time you donate and vote, sir, remember this day and these events.

Now, let's make certain Congress does not again cave, and come to the rescue of the criminals. The full court press will begin shortly.

OS Attends A Wedding, Sees A Ghost, And Is Inspired By Mrs. Ben Hogan

Well, not technically a ghost, the disembodied spirit of a departed person.But it was the next best thing.

The wedding itself was lovely this weekend. Not over-the-top, but elegant and lovely in the best sense of the words. Fabulous music, dignified church wedding.

Before the proceedings began, OS encountered an Old Acquaintance, who had married within two months of his wedding to the lovely Mrs. OS. He barely recognized the lady. Her marriage of twenty years had unraveled, and a family member was moving her stuff out of the house while she was at the wedding. Twenty years, child-rearing, built a business with the husband, kept the home fires burning as he traveled, on and on and on; and Bubbah-Hubby has traded her in for someone younger, dumber, and blonder. Twenty years earlier, Bubbah-Hubby had traded the previous one in for her. (Trophy Wife is a tough profession.) Old Acquaintance has lost thirty pounds, and she was never an ounce overweight to begin with. She had that look of someone who suddenly ages a decade. It was like seeing a ghost. It was disturbing.

After the wedding, Mrs. OS wanted to go out for dinner, and OS was delighted to oblige. She picked her favorite quiet bistro, and ordered the best steak, done just-so.

Anything she wants, she can have, by golly.

Some of the conversation was about the encounter at the wedding. It took a while for OS to calm down, and for reason to return. But for a while it was all 'How could he? How could she not have seen this outcome? Now what? How could he? What went wrong? How could he? What was he thinking? How could he?'

Mrs. OS was actually more lucid, reminding her husband that (1.) No, he had never even contemplated engaging in this behavior, and (2.) She had every reason to believe that he would never do this, and she wasn't worried. She wanted to make sure her husband felt appreciated. And, he does. He wakes every morning so grateful to have her, amazed that she's tolerated him all these years.

But, still, it was disturbing.

By contrast and coincidence, OS had checked a book out of the library the day before, Ben Hogan: The Man Behind The Mystique.

Actually, in great part it is about the marriage behind Hogan behind the mystique. So much of what he accomplished in public was made possible in private by his extraordinary marriage. He and Valerie met when she was fourteen, and they knew from the outset that they each had found their soulmate. They waited until young adulthood to marry, her family almost adopting him in the meantime. It was a loving, devoted, happy marriage for over sixty-five years. She traveled with him on the tour, long before it was common. He was golf's most single-minded and devoted student, and many many days were spent practicing. She never begrudged him, because she knew it was his only other passion beside her, and he wanted to live up to her faith in him by always doing his best. When the fateful car crash nearly took them both, he shielded her body from the collision of the oncoming passenger bus, an act which saved both their lives. When he nearly died of complications, and needed a particular surgeon, she went to the phone and called in favors from friends. The Army scrambled both the surgeon and the plane for the surgeon overnight. They were fiercely loyal one to the other, devoted to the very end of both their lives. You'll have to read the book to know the happiest of endings to this love story.

Now, that's a marriage! A story left untold until both had passed. But what an impact for good these two had upon their world.

Bubbah-Hubby just don't git it. OS's Old Acquaintance might yet, but at a terrible price.

In the meantime, OS is so grateful to have his own Valerie, and hopes someday he can be just a bit like Ben. She deserves no less.

In Case You Ever Wonder Where Italian Composers Get Their Inspiration For Opera Plots: Berlusconi And His Under-Aged Tart

What's Italian for: 'You just can't make this stuff up!'?

JUST when it looks as if things cannot get worse for Silvio Berlusconi, they do.

Earlier today Italy’s beleaguered prime minister learnt that prosecutors in Milan had formally made him a suspect in an investigation into alleged juvenile prostitution. Although the age of consent in Italy is 14, it is an offence to pay for sex with a prostitute aged under 18. According to a statement from Milan’s chief prosecutor, Mr Berlusconi is thought to have done just that. He is also suspected of abusing his position, a crime under Italian law.

The prime minister has not been charged, let alone indicted, and his lawyers have said that the accusations against him are "absurd and groundless". But whatever its outcome, this latest inquiry will be difficult for him to shrug off.

This would really be funny, if the country he's supposed to be running weren't held together with baling wire and chewing gum.

Or, perhaps, people like him in jobs like that create countries held together with baling wire and chewing gum...