Katherine Birbalsingh Weighs In On Amy Chua's 'Tiger Mother'

OS knew she would join in, sooner or later.

She has much to say that most white, comfortable, middle-class soccer-mom-football-dad parents don't wish to hear. The only path to true success in life (not just an SUV and a MacMansion) is hard work, and those habits are learned at home, taught by parents.

Like Amy Chua, my father never patted me on the back when I would get 95 per cent on a test. He would always ask, “What happened to the other 5 per cent?” As a child, it is true, I was constantly frustrated: what on earth did I have to do to please this man? But what that constant frustration inspired in me was to always try my best, to always reach for the very top. And as Amy Chua constantly emphasises, just because a parent is a bit demanding, doesn’t mean there isn’t any love. My parents were not as demanding as Amy Chua, and as such, my sister and I were allowed to watch television. When “Different Strokes” came on, (with Arnold and Willis as black boys adopted by a rich white man) my sister and I would call for my father with delight, and he would always come and watch it with us. That is, until he decided that we were watching too much television, and as if he and Amy Chua had connived together, gave our only television away.

Such parenting techniques are relatively rare in white liberal circles. And these days, with our multicultural communities, they are becoming more and more rare in non-white circles as well.  But while ‘tough love” may be the answer to giving our black boys a chance at life, so often the liberal helping hand undermines the parents who are trying to give these boys exactly this.

My Guyanese father may seem excessive to some but he sent his daughters to very ordinary state schools and had to make up for their shortcomings. And Amy Chua may be a little extreme in her parenting style, so much so that she has caused huge controversy. But if I had any advice to give to the thousands of struggling parents I have known over the years, the first thing I’d tell them is to take a page out of Amy Chua’s book and think twice about the liberal madness that surrounds us.


Lissen' up ya'll!! Ms. Birbalsingh's daddy emigrated from Guyana--look it up on the map--and sent his little girl to OXFORD! No, no, no. Not Oxford, Mississippi, that land of SEC basketball, bubbahs and drunken co-eds. The real Oxford--the one in England! THAT Oxford!

The one that's damn near impossible to get into, unless you have a real intellect and a work ethic like Monica Marks, the girl from Eastern Kentucky whose daddy insisted his baby girl was gonna succeed, come hell or high water.

That Oxford.

Thanks, Ms. B, for chiming in. Don't you let up a bit--keep after those 'liberals' who use an ideology to simply mask their laziness.

Here's hoping the conversation continues. The question is central to the survival of our culture.

OS has so much more to say, but he has work to do. University bills to pay, with the biggest grin imaginable on his grizzled Southern face...someday, he'll even get to tell you why.

The Tiger Mother Conversation Continues With And About Amy Chua

It's getting interesting out there.

New York Times weighs in.

In the week since The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt of the new book by Amy Chua, a Yale law professor, under the headline “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior,” Ms. Chua has received death threats, she says, and “hundreds, hundreds” of e-mails. The excerpt generated more than 5,000 comments on the newspaper’s Web site, and countless blog entries referring in shorthand to “that Tiger Mother.” Some argued that the parents of all those Asians among Harvard’s chosen few must be doing something right; many called Ms. Chua a “monster” or “nuts” — and a very savvy provocateur.

From academe, Mama PhD wrings her hands a bit, because as a therapist, she gets to deal with the damaged adult children of over-the-top parents. And, she has points to make as well.

At least, and at last, Dr. Chua's book is getting a real debate going about an issue no one wants to talk about--the hard grind that successful parenting truly is, whether one is a Tiger Mom or not.

In fairness, (and since OS's copy has not yet arrived), it is good to note the extended subtitle of the book.

This is a story about a mother, two daughters, and two dogs.

This was supposed to be a story of how Chinese parents are better at raising kids than Western ones.

But instead, it's about a bitter clash of cultures, a fleeting taste of glory, and how I was humbled by a thirteen-year-old.

OS is so happy to see the discussion taking place. Keep it up, ever'body!